Over For Another Time

Most of December 28 was spent relaxing by the pool, more eating, more drinking and more sun tanning. My alergic rash was improving and I enjoyed one more wonderful massage before dinner in the evening. We spent some time packing up our suitcases for the trip home, did some more reading and played a few games of dice.

Saturday the 29th was 'head-home' day. It had been an interesting vacation (somewhat different from the one we had in Cabo). The weather was beautiful the entire two weeks and it would be difficult to leave that behind. It would be nice to get back home though; now we can look forward to our next vacation!

Back to Las Caletas Beach Hideaway

Early December 27th we boarded the boat to return to Las Caletas Beach Hideaway (the same place we had attended Rhythms of the Night) for a day of activities at the beach. On the way over in the boat we saw some whales although didn't manage to get any real good pictures (a difficult task).

Las Caletas Beach Hideaway was once a private retreat for Hollywood's biggest stars. Today this tropical beach hideaway is exclusive to Vallarta Adventures. It is accessible only by boat.

There were many optional activities so we relaxed for a while on the beach, went Kayaking, I went to a Paella Cooking lesson (where we made Salsa & watched the chef make Paella) while George tanned on the sand, we had a wonderful lunch (which included the Paella from the cooking lesson) then took photos with the snake (George) parrots and monkeys. It was a great time (another first for me; kayaking) and we had fun there for the day.

When we returned from the day at the beach the rash on my neck was no better in fact it seemed to have spread around to the front of my neck, so a phone call directed us to the doctor. Seeing a doctor in Mexico is an experience all of its own (not bad just not anything we are accustomed to). The Doctor was located in an office on the street just off from the resort; it was signed 'Emergency Hospital'. We tried the door; it seemed to be locked; thinking we were at the wrong place, we continued down the street; soon the doctor poked his head out of the door and we went back; he had the door locked because it wouldn't stay closed.........hmmmmm. OK, into the office we go and the Doctor is there all by himself sitting behind his desk; invites us to sit; our consultation begins. After some questioning he examines my neck, writes a prescription, we pay the bill (700 Pesos) and we are on our way, George to find a drug store and I back to the room. We couldn't establish for certain what caused the rash but the Doctor seemed to have a suspicion it could have been from the beach towel I had been using (supplied by the resort). He said it was definitely an alergic reaction. After the lotion and pills for three days, which he prescribed, the rash was gone...........all's well that ends well...........another day in Mexico.

Merry Christmas

Merry Christmas to all and to all a Good Night !

There were few celebrations going on at our resort; Santa came for the children in the afternoon; there was a Christmas Eve and Christmas Day special menu at the restaurants with dance and musical entertainment..........other than that it was business as usual right through the holiday season.

We braved the bus system again on the 26th and wandered the streets of Bucerias to take a closer look. We bought some vanilla, I bought a dress and George bought a belt then it was back to the resort for the evening.

During dinner that evening I noticed an irritation on the back of my neck; it became very red with welts and was really itchy; I thought I had eaten something that I was alergic to; we rubbed it with Lavender Oil and I took an antihistamine.........went to bed expecting it would be better in the morning. 

Relaxation and Entertainment

December 23, a day of extra special relaxation for me with a massage, a facial, a pedicure and a manicure..........now that's a day of very special treatment. That was part of my Christmas present from George. It felt wonderful!

The next day (which was Christmas Eve) we created some frustration for ourselves by trying again to get on line without success. We spent some time by the pool, relaxed, ate, drank (more of the usual).






In the evening we boarded a boat at the Marina and headed to the secluded cove of Las Caletas Beach Hideaway for the performance (in a mystical amphitheater) called 'Rhythms of the Night'. A clear evening complete with stars and bright moon was the perfect setting for this amazing performance. The dance performance illustrated how ancient religions and beliefs influenced the myths, legends and cultures of Mexico. Fabulous show with very talented performers.



Following the show, we enjoyed a wonderful candlelight dinner by the seaside; the bar was open and the wide selection of food was great. I would recommend this adventure to anyone..........you would not be disappointed (I would definitely see it again; a most entertaining and enjoyable evening).

He Will Just Zip On Over

First rate luxurious ride on this fabulous Mexican Limosine (as the driver called it) to the jungle and the Los Veranos Canopy Tour, where George went zipping through the trees, over the rivers, visiting the termites and generally having a pretty fun time on the zip-lines.....(December 22).

Zip-lining seemed like it would be just a bit too scary for me so I waited with a coffee and my reader in the little restaurant at the end of the zip-liners adventure trail. As it turned out and as George told me later, it really was no more scary that parasailing (which I enjoyed in Cobo). Oh well perhaps next time I will try it.

At the end of their 'zipping' we ate lunch at the restaurant beside the river which flowed over the rocks (love the sound of a river perhaps because I grew up beside one)........it was really a nice setting. Later discovery showed I had been the recipient of yet more 'bites' (great!) but it was a fun trip and George enjoyed the adventure.

Back to the hotel, relaxed, went to Mediterranean night and entertainment at the resort then up to our room for a bit of reading and bed time.

Still Here

Well now, December 21st came, went and the world didn't END......we are all still here..........but I guess I'm getting a bit ahead of myself.

Tried to get on line (finally got a password to use hotel WiFi) and it seemed to work ok.....little did we know this would be our first of only two successful attempts to get on line. Oh well......................(that certainly wouldn't be the end of the world either I guess).

Another walk today in the morning to the mall, just to have a look around at the shops. I really notice that public safety doesn't appear to be an important issue in Mexico.......the sidewalks are an obstacle course at best and can be quite precarious if you don't pay attention to the holes and broken cement, the obstacles sticking up right in the middle of the walk, the almost invisible wires strung across areas (I could go on and on....:)..........walking in the mall I was just gazing around when George alerted me to what could have caused a serious accident; the floor dropped off about a foot and a half in front of us without a hint of any warning signs...........whew! Interesting place, but the truth is that in Mexico people are actually responsible for their own actions and you would not be able to sue the city for example, for a skinned knee, after having tripped over a broken section of sidewalk. Not an entirely bad concept. If the same were true in Canada and US I could actually go into a restaurant and be served a HOT cup of coffee!

Anyway; back to the hotel, sat by the pool, relaxed, ate, drank and sat in the hot tub after dinner..........

........................AND the world did not END!

Fandango

Walking to WalMart provided a much needed bit of exercise (since we had been doing a lot of sitting, eating, drinking) and we bought some 'Lime' Cornchips which we have only been able to find in Mexico. On the same trip we searched out a Pharmacy to check out some prices, walked back to the hotel, sat by the pool, had a few more drinks and relaxed for the rest of the day.

That evening (December 20) we attended the theatre performance at the 'Teatro Vallarta y Galeria de Arte Colunga'........'Fandango'. Fandango is a performance of creative music and dance interpretations expressing values, culture and customs of Mexico. It was a most delightful show with many talented musicians and dancers; we thoroughly enjoyed the evening.

We had taken a taxi downtown to the theatre and arrived a bit early so went exploring and wandering along the streets. A dress jumped out and grabbed me (just shortly after the store merchant) so we did a bit of bargaining and it was soon in a bag and in my possession.

Sunset Sailing Cruise

At some time during the morning of December 19 we decided to take a walk to Starbucks to see if we could get WiFi since it wasn't free at out hotel (fact a bit mind boggling for 2012) so that we could check if we had any messages that required our attention.

After much frustration and trying to get the Playbook to do what we wanted........Success............we had a coffee, got on-line, retrieved a message from Eric and Robin about Mocha, sent a reply and we were off back to our hotel.

That evening we went on a Sunset Sailing Cruise. I had never been sailing before (George had so it wasn't new for him); I was quite looking forward to the adventure. The crew was very friendly, we got drinks, lunch and a nice relaxing time on the ocean in a sailboat. Although we didn't get to see a sunset (it happened to be too cloudy) it was a beautiful warm evening and an enchanting experience that we both enjoyed.

Arriving

December 15/12

We encountered an accident on the way to the airport; had to make a short detour but all was well and we were there in plenty of time.Arrived in Puerto Vallarta at 4:30 local time. The line of people to clear customs was such that I have never before seen (it was that long).

No sooner were we past the customs point and we were 'grabbed' (I mean that literally) by the timeshare fishermen (horrible experience from which there seems no escape except to agree to attend a presentation). This happens at the airport as well as at the hotel after check-in where they enhance the pressure with free drinks. Check-in proved a bit of a challenge; they had record of our reservation for the second week but not for the first.........hmm interesting; finally got that squared away; put in out time with the timeshare fisherman and were done at last. By the time we got to our room it was late; we were both tired and ready for a good sleep........but happy to have arrived. We were staying at the Villa del Palmar (downtown), an old but nice resort.

Christmas Away This Year

So..........we are off to Puerto Vallarta for Christmas this year via Westjet from Abbotsford December 15 leaving at 10:00 am.

Friday evening we drove to Mt. Vernon to take Mocha to Eric and Robin's; they have agreed to take care of her while we are in Mexico. I'm sure she will be happy with them. 'Sasha-the-cat' doesn't especially care for Mocha; they have their issues but usually manage to survive each other. Tesla on the other hand, loves to have Mocha around; she can feed and take care of her. We are happy to have a safe place for Mocha to be and hope thay enjoy having her around for a couple of weeks.

Off to Edmonton

Cesar Millan in Abbotsford Nov 06............great show and send-off for my visit to Edmonton Nov 07.

Meet Rusty (I did)........I had heard lots about him before my visit; he really is a pretty cute little fella (much cuter I would say, than that alligatorish, lizardish fella they keep in the glass cage).

Just look........the height of innocence (he he), of course he is asleep...........the same cannot be said for this wonderful young man when he wakens. There might be any number of things happening around or beside him which have not the slightest thing to do with innocence, a few of which I have had personal knowledge and witness to. 

And then there was the whole (almost) clan; what can I say...........aren't they just the bestest grand kids anyone could wish for (inspite of the screwed up face on the centre one with hair of red - not to mention any names).

Well..............(just when I had bragged about the bestest grand kids) we find these two sillies playing in the dessert..........and we had to eat that dessert after they played in it......good grief....:)

So glad to have visited with everyone Nov 07-12, then sadly back home and to work again.

The Cascades

Everyone should take a trip through the Cascades.........amazing mountain views, fresh air and nature. Mocha stayed in Mt. Vernon with Robin, we drove the loop east through the Cascades, down to the Grand Coulee Dam, back west to Mt. Vernon to get Mocha, then home.

Our adventure started out in Mt. Vernon on Sep 14. Travelling on the North Cascades Hiway we passed by Ross Lake Dam and on through the Washington Pass Overlook where we ate lunch looking up at the beautiful mountains. It seemed a bit hazy; we later found out there were fires burning in the area though there was no smell of smoke. After eating our Sub Sandwich and wandering around looking at the beautiful scenery, we moved on to whatever else there was to see.

Winthrop was our next stop where we walked through the town a bit and looked in some shops (lots of quaint little shops there). The lure of gold brought the first permanent white settlers to this area in the late 1800's. The town is named after Theodore Winthrop (adventurer, traveler and gifted author). An old town with tons of history and many tales to tell including a fire which required the town be rebuilt (also in the late 1800's). Warings Saloon (built in 1891) survived the fire and is now the town hall. Many tales, but all for a writing of their very own.

Our trip continued through Okanagan where we stopped for a coffee, then moved along to the Grand Coulee Dam. The dam, built between 1933 and 1942 with 2 power plants (a third completed in 1974), is the largest electric power producing facility in the US and is the largest concrete structure in the world. In the evening a light show projected on the dam told a story about the history and construction of this project. Pretty amazing and again many tales, but all deserve a writing of their very own.

We bunked in Electric City for the night and followed our nose back home the next day (no actually we followed the hiway).

It was through Dry Falls (looking over the landscape) and on to Sun Lakes State Park where we spent a short while looking, and walking around the lake. It was a good time of year to explore because there were few tourists and lots of space. A busier time would have made a very pleasant sight a little less enjoyable. We visited the little store and chatted with a few people who were fishing off the dock and catching the odd fish..........everyone seemed very friendly and happy to visit with us.

Wenatchee was next on the way with the air still smokey and hazy. Wenatchee, (named for the Wenatchi Indian tribe) is known as the Apple Capital of the World.  Along the way there were some folk by the Wenatchee River (this couple with their dog and another fellow panning for garnets) so George checked out that situation and he found a couple tiny garnets that we took home. Time spent stopping beside the river, exploring the paths and trails along the way was peaceful and restful.

  

There is something about the sound of a river flowing that always reaches inside me; soothes me. We continued through Skykomish Pass on to Everett and Mt. Vernon for dinner with Robin, Tesla and Tugce (Mexican Food).

Mocha was happy to see us although we know she was well taken care of and spoiled while we were away. Little Tesla loves to be with Mocha, feeding her and petting her and covering her with a blanket etc. and Mocha has learned to be quite tolerant of her. I'm glad they get along well.

Our trip through the Cascades was short but a most enjoyable break. I hope to explore that trail again sometime.

Dreams Can Live

As I grew older and began to examine the things I had done in my life I realized there were a few things I had always 'wanted' to do but didn't ever pursue. Learning to fly was one of those aspirations.
For my birthday George got me an hour flight in an ultra-lite. So on Sept 03, I had the choice to fly over the city or over the mountains; of course I chose the mountains. I struggle with finding the words to describe this experience. I was at first a little apprehensive; feeling a bit nervous. It was a very exciting time for me as we flew over the mountains and lakes; through the beautiful soft fluffy white clouds. The pilot let me fly the plane which was quite a thrill.

Although I will probably never actually learn to fly (in this lifetime) this day was like a dream come to life for me. I wrote a poem about this wonderful gift George gave me. Here it is:

                              A Dream Can Live

                       Mountains grand, with craggy peaks and crevices
                        but a breath away from my finger tips
                        Lakes below, green and smooth as glass
                        far away, seemed off in another world
                        Fluffy white clouds, inviting a body to sleep
                        floating just beyond the window's edge
                        This picture cloaked in shimmering rays of sunshine
                        a perfect day for gathering thought
                        It was what I imagined freedom to be
                        up here where the breezes live
                        where the eagles soar
                        Tipping the wings
                        Dipping the nose
                        Turning, floating around in the sky
                        The feeling of freedom was grand
                        nary a burden or care could I find
                        just the sky, the clouds, the wind and me
                        as we explored the path of the birds
                        The corn maze, the bridges, the city in motion
                        was a sight from high above
                        Far off I could see Mt Baker
                        clean and fine and fierce
                        But then........
                        I had the controls
                        I could feel movement giving in to my touch
                        I was flying the plane
                        It was a thrill and an honor
                        to respect the hold of this enchanting machine
                        I shall keep the memory of this day
                        to my heart for always
                        the day I went flying with the wind
                        There is but one thing
                        that would have made it
                        more special, more memorable, more awesome
                        If I could have held your hand
                        lay my head on your shoulder
                        to share these special moments all with you

                        It was a wonderful thoughtful gift
                        It was a magical day
                        a reminder forever that dreams can live

                        Remembering my (birthday) flight, Sep 03/12
                        Thank you George,
                        Love forever 'n ever

A Favorite Place

(Writing prompt WFSC August 18/12)

The prompt was to use a series of words in one piece, so I decided to write about our Hot Air Balloon Ride using those words.......,
(the words are highlighted in the piece).........here it is.

The evening was calm, clear, warm, on August 24th; perfect for a balloon ride and that's just exactly what I was going to do, accompanied by the handsome love of my life. Side by side we stood to watch as the staff sent up a small balloon to test the winds. It was really quite exciting. I had never been on a balloon ride before; this was going to be a new adventure.

I looked into the basket sitting on the trailer, which was to be our little haven for the duration of our flight as we floated high above the trees. Wondering how I would get inside I reluctantly asked the question and was told it would not be a problem. Unconvinced, I worried about how I would climb aboard as my fingernail snapped from the pressure I enforced upon it. Clutching my book and little green towel I turned the pages, quickly finding the place I had left off reading. Now you might ask what I was doing with a book and towel on a balloon ride; good question; I asked the same one of myself; nonetheless I had both with me in my little tote bag; the tote bag with a kingfisher held in captivity on the side panel. This tote went everywhere with me so now it was going on a balloon ride; the book, well it occupied me while I waited; the towel would mop up my tears (if it came to that).

Soon it was time to climb into the van. We were on our way to the launch site as our pilot told of his adventures on previous flights in Australia.
Arriving at the site, the basket was quickly unloaded, the balloon unfolded and the inflation began, with the help of George and another volunteer each holding it open so that air could be forced into the huge sack. At just the right time the air was heated up to finish and ready us for flight. When the balloon was upright, it was time for loading which, to my relief went quite smoothly as I climbed into the basket via small openings in the side walls, the large metal frame to hold on to and just a slight boost from George. Inside the basket there was ten plus the pilot so it was a bit cramped and with no flight attendant we had to get our own drinks and snacks as well as find our own way to the wash room. That was a bit of a pickle to be in but we managed quite well; in fact we felt almost as content as a frog on a lily pad if you can imagine what that might be like.
Quickly we rose up over the huge trees which circled the little green landing space from where we launched. Soon we were up and overlooking the shoreline as we passed over a lake where the water lillies floated near the rocks and the fish laughed at us as they swam in our shadow. To our left we watched the other balloon float beside us as the shadow of our craft slowly blocked their sunshine. Beyond the other balloon was the beautiful Mt. Rainier. We could see the tall buildings of Seattle off in the distance amidst the haze. Soon the sun would set and at that moment it was a spectacular sight up here above the world below. There was such a feeling of freedom floating here; if it were possible to stay up indefinitely, this could quickly become my favorite place to be.
All too soon we began to descend towards the ground with a soccer field as our landing target. We passed over a small waterway in which we were able to see the reflection of our balloon as we passed over. The pilot expertly put us down on the soccer field without event and we all climbed out and watched as the staff readied the balloon for loading and its next flight. It was with a feeling of sadness that our flight was over.
At journeys end we visited a winery with snacks, wine tasting and stories. The balloon ride was a very memorable adventure which I would be happy to take part in again.

Special Summer Visitors (3)

August 28; more special visitors. Aaron and Diane arrived for a quick visit. Seemed like they just got here and they were gone.
I really do miss having Aaron out here since he moved back home.
George and I did some fun things with them while they were here; played a few games in the evening; went to Cirque du Soleil; went go-karting; went for all-you-can-eat Sushi; and of course did lots of chatting and visisting. They did some exploring on their own as well. It was nice to get to meet Diane and get to know her a bit.
They had planned to take a day trip to Seattle but it seems Aaron forgot to bring his passport so that was out of the question. Oh well next time!
One evening they cooked dinner for us....baked salmon which was very good. We had a very nice visit and were so glad they got to come out and spend some time with us (they went back home on Sep 2nd)......hopefully they can do it again real soon.

Special Summer Visitors (2)

More grandbabies visit...........!!!

July 24th Danielle, Tyler, Levi and Austin came to spend the day with George (unfortunately I had to work). They spent most of the day at the aquarium, then I met them after work for dinner at Whitespot. After dinner we came back home for a visit.

Levi thouroughly enjoyed all there was to see & experience at the aquarium. He is certainly growing and it seems hard to believe that next year he will be going to Kindergarten.

Austin has grown a ton also since we saw him last fall. He is a quiet and laid back little fellow; cute as a button.

We spent a short while with them in Mt. Vernon where we all visited with Robin, Tugce and Tesla.

We are glad that we were able to spend some time with them while they were out this summer. The kids have grown so much; it would be nice if we were able to see them more often.

Special Summer Visitors (1)

June 28th arrived; Shelby and Benji(e) arrived with it; for a wonderful special summer visit as a part of Benji(e)'s 12th birthday celebration this year. They stayed with us until July 03; time flew by like the wind; then they were gone; I miss them; it was so nice to have you both here.

In spite of the rain which fell for most of the days, we still managed to do lots of fun things with them.

June 29th:

We visited the Vancouver Aquarium and drove around Stanley Park.

June 30th:

Movie time (tooooo rainy)........."The Hunger Games" (first film). We had Sushi for dinner; everyone enjoyed that. Then slurpies were in order so the kids got slurpies and they bought us flowers (very nice).

July 01: Beach time.........they explored the beach in Whiterock; had ice cream from the ice cream shop (also in Whiterock). Canada Day Celebrations were happening in Surrey; kids had a few rides & a snack, then home & Benji(e) found some new friends (met the kids downstairs) and they played ball outside. Later in the evening we enjoyed the fireworks.

July 02:

Trip to Granville Island (began raining while we were there); had lunch; came home and Benji(e) made cookies and Shelby made pudding (yummy). Ben played with the kids from downstairs again.

July 03:

Finally made it to the GoCarts (we thought the rain was going to keep us away) but everyone enjoyed the day there. Hurried home to have dinner and get to the airport..........then they were gone.

It went by altogether too quickly; seemed almost like I imagined they were here. I am so glad they came to spend some time with us. We enjoyed having them.

Little RollyBear

It was July 14 and nearly 9:30 am in Alberta; our little Rolly Bear closed his eyes for the last time.

I wasn't there to say goodbye; but was there in spirit. Many happy memories of Rolly live in my heart & I will miss him as I know he will be missed by his forever family.

We didn't want to see this day come but he told us it was time to go; no choice but to accept that. This poem is for you my little RollyBear.

Tribute to Our Special Friend

The sun has set for you

Sweet little RollyBear

Your leash is hung

Your bowls are clean and shiny

Your little coat is washed and bright

You’ll not need them now because

the place you’re going will provide

never ending food in bowls of special crystal

fresh ice water in diamond sparkled dishes

coats of silken sunshine

You’ll wander across the fields of green

sniffing sweet doggie smells

that sail on soft and gentle breezes

Most of all your life will be filled with love

as much love as you had here dear friend

We love you so and wish it didn’t need to be

But we know; you have told us;

It was time for you to go

So we must bid you safe journey little one

You now will sit

upon a cushion of cloudy softness

Your hurts will all be gone

Your dreams will fill your eyes with visions now

We send you off with love

hold memories in our hearts

of all the happiness you brought

the smiles, the laughter, the licks

the wagging tail, the bright little eyes

the hidden treats (in plain view),

that only you could find

the times you went exploring and we would search for you

the times you jumped up on our knee,

cuddled on our shoulder

the times you hurried to greet us at the door

the times you brought joy to little daycare folk

the times you licked our ice cream cone

the times you rode up in your Mufasa seat

the times you got treats at the drive through bank

Everywhere we look

we will remember you special little RollyBear

We’ll feel you in the wind

We’ll see you in the stars

We’ll feel you in the raindrops

We’ll see you in the moon beams

We were blessed you shared your life with us

Rest now, you were and always will be

Our Special Friend

What is a Writer

"What is a writer?" I used to ask. I didn't know exactly what a writer was, thinking it was surely someone much more than what I was (whatever that meant and whatever I was). I thought of a writer as someone who wrote big beautiful books for me to read; I didn't write big beautiful books for you to read (or any kind of books) so I wasn't a writer. I thought of a writer as someone who was a well-known name; I wasn't, so I wasn't a writer. Truth is I was 'just someone who wrote some poetry and a few short stories'........I wasn't a writer.

As time passed and after joining a writers' group I eventually learned that a WRITER was someone who WROTE.........it was that simple. Whether I ever publish big beautiful books or my name becomes 'household', I write, so I am a writer.
Writing plays a big part in my life; I write poetry, I blog, I write short stories (some true, some fiction). Through my writing I am able to show my family how much they mean to me (I write poems for my grandchildren; their birthdays, sometimes Christmas, other occasions or just because). Being able to express feelings by writing, was a meaningful outlet for me when my daughter Carla passed away. Putting my thoughts on paper allows me to express, in artistic fashion, many facets of my life and the many emotions that make it full. I am able to reach other people and touch their heart with my writing, whether it is to make them smile or shed a tear; that is rewarding.

Writing is something I can do at home, away from home, at work, at play, on the move, in big spaces, in small spaces, outside, inside, with a pen, with a pencil, with my computer, in the morning, evening, middle of the night.........the list is endless; how many things can you do that offer as many choices in which to act, as that?

I find topics (or sources) to write about from everywhere; even places or situations that wouldn't seem to offer one possible spark of an idea.......that is, if I stay aware and keep my eyes, ears and nose peeled for the seeds. In addition to finding sources for writing all around me, I sometimes write from Writing Prompts. Wherever I locate my notions, if the writing bug bites at the time, I must write about it (whatever it might be, serious, funny, sad, crazy, or even frightening) at work or play.

One thing for sure is that I love to write and when I stray away from it for a time I feel like something is missing. I get a sense of accomplishment when I have written my idea or thought to completion.

WWU Writing Prompt May 12/12

Dear Me

Now then…….it’s 5:00 am (just like you say to me sometimes) and I have never been to sleep; not ever; not since I was born; I don’t get covers; I don’t have a pillow; I don’t go to bed; I don’t even have a bed to go to. Do you think that’s a little unfair? You tell me all the time how you can’t sleep because this, that or the other has ruptured your soul by some act of unkindness or some thoughtless deed. I listen; I let you pour out your heart to me. I never judge you or your actions. I keep your secrets. I am always here for you. Do you think you could at least hold me tenderly before you throw me into your drawer or better yet do you think you could hold me to your heart for just a moment; let me feel its beat; then place me some where warm and soft where I might at least be glimpsed by other people instead of having to stay hidden away in the dark drawer, underneath all your undies smelling of laundry soap and fabric softener? Do you think?

  

My jacket is in need of repair; it has holes in both sleeves. My insides are so tattered and worn; some are going to fall out soon; most are filled with, or waiting to digest emotional confessions of one sort or another; many are wrinkled and stained from the tears that fell on them; few are left on which you could give me any more food for thought; what will become of the whole when the parts are full? I worry about that. Will I be tossed away to remain in that dark drawer forever with the laundry scent, or worse will I be tossed away in some trunk and taken to the attic to be found by someone maybe 20 years following? I can’t let that happen because I have vowed to keep your secrets. Don’t leave me behind unprotected or I won’t be able to keep my promise to you. That will crush me if I must betray you.

I feel so alone when you aren’t filling my insides with grumblings, happenings, words and thoughts. Sometimes there are periods when you abandon me for weeks on end; seems like those are your happiest times; I hear your laughter but I don’t get to feel it. I would like to feel the happy times too; not just the trials. I heard you tell someone just the other day that your beautiful grand babies were coming to visit; how excited you were to be seeing them; how much you missed them; all the things you were going to do together. If only I could have felt your excitement inside of me; just hearing your words isn’t the same; hearing about the things you will do is not the same as taking me there with your pen. I want to feel the sunshine in your heart. Do you think you could share the happy times with me?

Do you think?

This is what has been keeping me awake………. Dear, Dear Me.

Will That Be Filled or Pulled

June 14

Ah yes, that most enjoyable of events; the visit to the dentist. Over the years I have met some extremely nice dentists but I am still unable to bring myself to be happy about seeing them (however nice). I have never met anyone who has expressed joyous anticipation over a visit to their dentist; have you?

As I think about it, the dentists must feel bad that people don't look forward to seeing them...........or do they know? Hmmmmmm, perhaps I will ask my dentist when I visit tomorrow. What shall I say?........."Where you aware that nobody likes a visit to your chair?".........Well, I will think of something I am sure.

Tomorrow I am having bone grafting done in preparation for implants; not exactly sure why I am putting myself through this seriously expensive procedure but I have made the decision and there's seems to be no turning back now.

To prepare for this big event I needed to get a prescription (which turned out to be four different things)..........instructions for which I needed to call to have clarified. Gone are the days of the two dental choices; will that be filled or pulled?

The possibilities for dental fixes today are quite amazing.
June 15

Procedure done, day half gone, drink for lunch, freezing out and now I am really wondering now why I decided to do this grafting thing. For the moment it is very painful; hope it improves soon; Ava's birthday party tomorrow (hoping I feel like attending).

Dinner time; another drink for dinner; got a bit of rest during the afternoon; feeling much better; should be ok for Ava's party.
June 16
Three am; can't sleep (not because of mouth).
Just occurred to me that I visited the dentist and neglected to ask whether she knew that nobody liked to visit her. While waiting to be called in for my appointment though, I read, in a magazine, an article done about my dental company wherin they covered and commented on that very thing & how they were trying to find ways to put people at ease over dental visits. Good luck; you surely haven't done that for me yet; maybe if I had had implants when I was born none of this would have to happen now. (Think of the money saved over the years). Ridiculous idea you think?........maybe not.......and who knows what may happen in the future. After all the concept of 'Will that be filled or pulled' is forever gone and been replaced with todays many amazing options. One day we may be able to switch out our teeth to match our outfit (like we do shoes).
OK OK I will quit now.........will just wait for healing, stitch removal, then the next procedure in this long process.

True Friends

This is a piece I wrote May 25, 2006, and decided to post it on my blog as I think about 'friends and friendship'

Laughter, shouting and giggles she heard; all happy sounds from so many children; there were kids playing ball; some running about on the end of a kite string; others just sauntering across the grass; still more on the swing.  Sitting in a chair with her coffee, she looked reflectively out the window across the playground.  It was the swing that captivated her gaze; the back and forth motion lulling her into a dream-like state; taking her back to another time so long ago.

In another place a swing was carrying her up into the air towards a feeling of freedom from realities on the ground.  As it slowed there were children milling about, all smiling at her with their hands out.  Ah that was it.  They wanted some of the candy she had tucked away in the little pocket on her dress.  Sweet little candies; various pastel shades; some heart shaped; some circular; all with writing on.  Some said ‘I Love You’; others ‘Will You Be Mine?’; there were some that just said ‘Friends’.  That’s what she longed for, friends; someone to play with, talk to, spend time with, smile at her.  They were all there talking to her, not paying any attention to the funny little accent she had acquired after going to school in England.  She was happy and excited to have friends at last.  As she smiled now, there was a warm feeling bubbling around inside her.

Her new friends pushed her up high on the swing; she felt like she was an eagle soaring in the clouds. She closed her eyes and smiled; content with her newfound playmates. The swing slowed again; she once more shared candies all around with everyone. They again pushed her up high into the sky where she could relax and think about tomorrow, spending time with her friends. Slowing to almost no movement at all she noticed that everyone again had their hands out. She reached inside her pocket and brought out the bag that contained the sweet little morsels only to find there were just two left. Oh well she thought I will have more candy another day. She herself had only eaten one candy from the bag; the rest she had offered her friends. The two candies were quickly snatched up by a couple of hands; the bag went flying to the ground. She felt rather sad that the candies were all gone but she was happy she had new friends.

To her dismay, she was quickly pushed from the swing and away from the group who now were making fun of her because they said she talked funny. That took her back to school in England where she had also been teased because she ‘talked funny’; where she had been punished because of all things, she drew a line down the centre of the page in her arithmetic scribbler, the teacher slapping her desk so hard with a ruler she became terrified and started to cry. Her teacher came to her home and reported that she cried at school every day. Her mom and her aunt along with her teacher tried desperately to figure out why she cried every day. (I can’t imagine can you?) She had only one little friend who would play with her, a little girl called Heckie who she will always remember.

Finding this swing episode all too hard to understand she wandered over to a quiet corner of the playground where she sat on the ground against the fence. How could it be that no matter what she did they said she ‘talked funny’? When she went to England she thought she talked like everyone else. They didn’t think so. She somehow picked up their way of talking ‘proper’ and now she was back home and the kids here said she ‘talked funny’. As well it seemed they didn’t want to be friends now that her candy was all gone. This was just too much for one little girl to grasp. What would she do? She felt so alone.

Back in her chair, with her coffee, looking out the window across the playground, alone, she realized that her shirt was damp from the tears that were falling. Reality returned as she listened to the sounds of the children playing outside. This daydream seemed to come back for her every year around Valentine’s Day as soon as she spotted the sweet little candies with the writing on. She found them in the store & brought some home every year. The ones that tugged at her heartstrings most were those that simply said ‘Friends’. They seemed to serve as a reminder to her; a reminder that all people are not true friends; a reminder about how she should take very good care of her friendships.